About that new year's resolution: we might be missing the best kind
Research continues to show focusing on the needs of others is where the personal pay-off is.
In her recent WSJ article, “Already Abandon Your Resolutions? You Probably Set the Wrong Ones Anyway,” author Stephanie Harrison makes the case for rethinking our self-focus in those New Year’s resolutions. The author of New Happy: Getting Happiness Right in a World That’s Got It Wrong, she’s not a novice on the topic.
If you find that your new year’s resolutions leave you tired, unfulfilled and lacking joy within a few weeks, Harrison has a fix. Particularly since the 80s, we’ve been largely conditioned, she says, to believe that happiness comes from pushing and pleasing ourselves. Yet the science continues to show that’s not how happiness works. The research continues to say that’s not how it works.
A study in the American Psychological Association’s journal Emotion, for instance, shows performing acts of generosity—as simple as opening a door for others, or bringing coffee to someone—boosts happiness and well-being and is even linked to physical health benefits, including lower blood pressure. Other research shows greater longevity and lower depression in older adults.
Harrison notes that if there’s a pay-off in “chasing pleasure and prestige,” it isn’t showing up in research. “A 2024 Gallup survey found that less than half of Americans say they are “very satisfied” with their personal lives—a near record low. A 2024 American Psychiatric Association survey found that one in three Americans say they feel lonely at least every week. In the latest World Happiness Report international happiness rankings, the U.S. fell from 15th to 23rd place.
One suggestion Harrison makes is to follow the example of Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter and dedicate one week a month to helping others. We don’t have to build homes like they did. There are plenty of small opportunities: offer a compliment or a favor, or volunteer regularly, or even just spend a day a week committed to being more patient. Not enough time? Harrison says studies show busy people often feel paradoxically rich in time when they give time away.